In typical Arian fashion, I have (and do have) loads of dream jobs whose importance will shift depending on various factors in my life. It was always a dream to work at the UN, and while I didn’t get paid for my work I had that dream job for almost three years. I always wanted to translate a book and translated two last year. Archival research, check. Dancer, check. Model, check. Grantwriter, check. Actress, check. Live in Spain, check. And today I got the news that I can check off one of my top dreams: to work in a newspaper! Life is amazing.
I can see the work will not nearly be as exciting as I always imagined, and the job I have accepted happens to be the most difficult with the least amount of credit. Good ol’ Sezin, can’t do anything but the hard way! But I will be hearing news before it is even news to the rest of you, and I will be helping one of the few English newspapers in Turkey (www.turkishdailynews.com.tr) become a better paper. That is exciting. The job will entail loooooong days and the tedius work of editing (or re-writing as the case may be), but I will be a part of the print publishing world at long last. Who knows what this will lead to next, but it certainly opens a great deal of new doors and is an answer to my prayer for a life outside of Dilko.
Since I will be working from 9-6 six days out of the week in a high pressure environment with loads of deadlines, I don’t imagine that I will be coming here all that often to write anymore. And I’m sort of glad for that. I think I need to give this space a rest; I’ve been feeling a bit burned out about it. I need a change. I need some new energy and obviously The Creator thinks I need less pondering alone time. This is good.
And while I feel exhausted just thinking about the work weeks I have ahead of me, I am also going to take this job as an experiment to see if the detachment with which I view other people’s work lives can shift to my own. My goals are to not get stressed, regardless of the stress-levels of everyone around me. To always keep in mind that this is only a job and not worth my mental or physical health in getting stressed out or overwhelmed by. I will not participate in work dramas even if baited, and will go to work, do my job and return home at the end of the day a few lira richer than the day before, as well as having improved the level of writing in at least my small corner of the vast writing world. Mainly, I am making the decision to not participate in other people’s dramas, and I will not create dramas in my own environment. This job will be a great test of this resolve and if I can maintain calm and collectedness while working in a newsroom, then maybe I will be ready for another one of my dream jobs: to work in a refugee camp in the Congo or Sudan.
The most incredible thing about all of this was how unexpected yet perfect this opportunity is. It came out of nowhere and worked out just like that. AND it is one of my dream jobs! It makes me feel even more strongly the Divine presence of The Creator, who hears our prayers and has a plan for us even though we may not always see the bigger picture. This is indeed a wonderful life, and I am overjoyed to be in this here and now.